DOES GOD EXIST? JUST ASK PELL, JONES AND DAWKINS (Fin Review April 13)

Here are the edited highlights of the debate between Cardinal Pell, Richard Dawkins and Tony Jones on Monday night’s Q&A.

Pell: For some extraordinary reason God chose the Jews. They weren't intellectually or morally the equal of the Egyptians or the Persians. The poor little Jewish people, they were shepherds.

Jones: But being a shepherd isn’t a reflection on your intellectual capacity?

Pell: It is of your intellectual development.

Jones: Are you including Jesus, who was Jewish? Was he not intellectually up to it?

Pell: For some reason God chose a very difficult (hesitates)… but actually they are now an intellectual elite, because over the centuries they have been pushed out of every other form of work. Jesus is the greatest man that ever lived so I’ve got a great admiration for the Jews but we don't need to exaggerate their contribution.

Question: Explain in layman's terms how the universe came from nothing?

Dawkins: When you have matter and antimatter and you put them together, they cancel each other out and give rise to nothing. If you start with nothing the process can go into reverse.

Jones: Is the “nothing” you're talking about some creative force?

Dawkins: You can dispute exactly what is meant by nothing but whatever it is it’s very simple. (Audience laugh) Why is that funny?

Pell: I think it’s a bit funny trying to define nothing.

Jones: Do you accept humans evolved from apes?

Pell: Yeah, from Neanderthals.

Dawkins (outraged): Neanderthals were our cousins! We’re not descended from them and we’re both descended from...

Pell: Where will I find a Neanderthal today if they're my cousins?

Dawkins: They’re extinct.

Pell: That’s my point.

Jones: At what point was a soul imparted to the humans from God?

Pell: A soul is not like putting a spot of gin in a tonic. We know the first humans developed in Africa because of the drawings in caves. No such thing from Neanderthals.

Dawkins: Successive Popes have tried to suggest that the soul did indeed get added, rather like gin to tonic.

Pell: The soul is the principle of life. There are animal souls.

Dawkins: Do jellyfish...?

Pell (earnestly): All living things do. We have a voice box, which is one of the great miracles, so we can communicate our thoughts rather than just grunting.

Jones: Is it possible for an atheist to go to heaven?

Pell: Certainly. We will all be there as continuing persons in a new heaven and a new earth.

Jones: Billions of individual souls existing in some galactic space?

Pell (shrugging): How it will work out I've got no idea. It’s also the view of some of the Jews.

Dawkins: What’s going to happen when we die depends on whether we're buried or cremated. I don't believe you mean that the wafer turns into the body of Christ?

Pell (indignantly): I don't say things I don't mean. The son of God says, “This is my body. This is my blood,” and I’d much prefer take his word than yours.

Dawkins (snidely): So you do not mean that the wafer turns into the body in any sense in which normal English language usage would understand?

Pell: I remember when I was in England we were preparing some young English boys, they were from very... (Audience laugh) Thank you. Preparing them for the first communion. We Catholics believe there is a hell. I certainly believe in a place of purification. It will be like getting up in the morning and throwing the curtains back.

Jones: Why create a world with so much suffering?

Pell: My first Easter as a priest was in Italy. Very sad village. All the men were away in Germany or Switzerland getting big money, home only for three weeks a year. I said: "Well, look, Christ suffered too. Christ had a bad run.”

Jones (shifting awkwardly): Can I take it to a higher level? The Holocaust, genocide, famine? Why does an omnipotent God let these things happen?

Pell (frowning): Probably no people in history have been punished the way the Germans were. It’s a terrible mystery.

Jones (trying to hide his alarm): There’s a very strong argument saying the Jews of Europe suffered worse than the Germans.

Pell (nodding): That might be right. Certainly there was suffering in both.

Question: Cardinal, how can you be against gay marriage when equality and respect are the foundations of love?

Pell: Christians love everybody.

Jones: Do you believe homosexuality is part of God's natural order?

Pell: Creation is messy. The oriental carpet makers always leave a little flaw in their carpet.

Jones: Are you suggesting homosexuals are flawed?

Dawkins (tetchily): I’m interested in whether God is actually there.

Pell: So am I.

Some conversations defy satire.

ANOTHER GREEN WORLD (Spectator leader April 13)

It’s time that Australians took a long hard look at the man whose science fiction fantasies are tampering with our pay packets. From July 1st, Australia’s economic wellbeing and financial prospects are beholden to the delusional whims of a man who, it would appear, is clearly a few trees short of an old-growth forest. Bob Brown’s ravings at a town hall packed with fellow “Earthians”, where he laid out his plans for a Global parliament (in which an Australian representative would have about as much clout as a Green in Campbell Newman’s Queensland) at the same time as lamenting the extinction of extra-terrestrials due to climate change (yep, seriously) would be disturbing if they were from some fringe activist or obscure backbencher but are beyond alarming when they come from our de facto Deputy PM.

Make no mistake; there would be no $23 a tonne carbon tax under this government if Bob Brown hadn’t insisted on it. Yet in all the acres of analysis of climate change, endless editorials and opinion pieces selling or deriding the carbon tax, the talkback, the adverts, the rallies and the convoys, any in-depth analysis of Bob Brown’s ideology, track record and personal beliefs is virtually non-existent. It’s as if as a nation we embraced Dianetics without bothering to check out L. Ron Hubbard.

Although it is tempting simply to laugh at him, a harmless clown he is not. Apart from Gerard Henderson, Chris Uhlmann, Miranda Devine, Andrew Bolt and (in this issue) Peter Costello, our mainstream media – perhaps intimidated by Brown’s hysterical “hate-media” campaign, or simply taken in by the Green’s phony morality - refuses to scrutinize this dangerous politician and his anti-productive, anti-growth ideas. It’s time Australians took a closer look at Bob Brown before he takes us all to La La Land.

RELIABLE AND COMPETENT (Spectator leader April 13)

“Relaxed and comfortable” was the mantra of John Howard’s government, but looking back at what was clearly Australia’s golden decade, “reliable and competent” might be a more accurate moniker.

By and large, the previous Coalition government could be relied upon to deliver its election commitments in a competent fashion, to the benefit of the economy and the community. Of itself, this sounds a rather mundane and unimpressive boast. Isn’t that what all governments are supposed to do? But as we get well into the fifth year of Labor’s tumultuous and destructive period in office, “reliable and competent” appear goals as distant and unattainable for this government to achieve as Thorpie’s recent quest for another Olympic gong.

“Politically unreliable” and “managerially incompetent” would be a more accurate description of almost every federal initiative undertaken. The Rudd era fiascos of pinks batts, the ETS, and Grocerywatch seem like quaint slip-ups when compared to the latest multi-million dollar mishaps of Gillard, Swan, Conroy et al.

Whether it be the disgraceful duplicity of the Australia Network tendering process, the ongoing pork-barreling of the NBN with its whiteboard-style choice of which lucky Labor electorate gets what and when, the teeth-grinding behavior of Fair Work Australia, the inexcusable refusal of the government to front up to the Craig Thomson allegations, the Machiavellian maneuverings over who gets what out of the mining tax, or the vast sums being squandered before the carbon tax has even been introduced to keep the energy companies onside, what typifies Labor’s actions is a sly disdain for the truth combined with breathtaking ineptitude and financial recklessness.

The list goes on. Unions running amok. Business disquiet over the mooted diesel rebate removal. The abandonment of genuine, much-needed tax reform. The stuff-ups over asylum seekers, cattle exports, and gaffes such as threatening PNG sanctions. At every turn, in stark contrast to its predecessor, this government manages to be either unreliable in its commitments or incompetent in their implementation.

It requires no effort of imagination to predict that the big ticket items, the MRRT, the carbon tax and the NBN, will be as clumsily implemented as all Labor’s other ill-prepared and rushed-through schemes. Lack of consultation, a failure to anticipate problems and a fingers-crossed-behind-the-back management style will continue to be their hallmark, with inevitable consequences.

A billion lost here, a couple of hundred million gone there. Taxpayers’ hard-earned wealth is being frittered away through errors of judgment at an alarming rate. Meanwhile, business groups warn that our overseas competitors are eagerly poised to take full advantage of our self-inflicted imposts, whilst inevitably, investment in exploration for new mines is heading to cheaper fields abroad.

The tragedy for Australian prosperity is that there is one area where the Gillard team will always remain reliable and competent; clinging onto power through whatever means it takes. Miraculously, the carbon tax “compensation” payouts will competently deliver a bucktload of cash at precisely the right time for the next election. You can rely on it.

THE LABOR MESSIAH (Spectator Easter leader)

The search for a messiah to lead them out of the wilderness will certainly intensify within Labor ranks if not before the next election then certainly the day afterwards.

Call it the curse of Gough, but Labor, more so than any other political party, constantly seeks a mystical leader capable of inspiring the masses. Whether it be the “light on the hill” or the Tree of Knowledge, the “greatest moral challenge” or “true believers,” Labor mythology likes to imbue events and personalities with qualities above and beyond those of mere mortals.

However great the left’s heroes may or may not have been, what the last two decades has shown is that the Labor Party struggles to draw a distinction between the statesman, the showman, and the shaman.

Bob Carr was arguably a great media performer in his heyday, but the way he is being wheeled out now on every occasion and on any subject is increasingly embarrassing to watch – akin to a ham actor struggling to pull off his old stage tricks.

Bill Shorten’s frequent media appearances also have an uncomfortable sense of déjà vu about them, as he attempts to channel Bob Hawke – the pragmatic reconciler of the great divisions between the working and managerial classes. What such an act forgets is that the unions, although desperately important to the Labor Party, bear very little relevance to working Australians, other than as the butt of gags about credit cards and prostitutes.

Displaying all the warmth and empathy of Nosferatu in Clark Kent glasses, fellow ex-union boss Greg Combet also falls well short of delivering on messianic appeal. Stephen Smith is, well, Stephen Smith. Crean comes across like a contender for the next series of Grumpy Old Men.

Wayne Swan, who played Judas to Rudd’s futile attempt at messianic resurrection, clearly sees himself as a potential savior. His recent Sermon in the Monthly and attacks in the temple of public opinion on the money lenders and mining magnates were blatant pitches to the unions to support him. What he fails to understand is that the voters – particularly in the crucial Queensland seats –will never forgive his betrayal of one of their own.

Forget the blokes. Penny Wong and Nicola Roxon will be the ones to watch post-Julia.

To the spin merchants of Sussex Street, it is the spokesperson who is more important than the product they are trying to sell. The faceless men and women (surely in a progressive party such as the ALP there can be faceless women, too?) still seem incapable of understanding that it is the policies, not the politician, that ultimately triumphs.

Labor still hopes that the carbon tax – an anomalous economic “reform” born of a blatant lie and a cynical backroom deal – will be their road to salvation, as money flows into the economy by way of “compensation.” Thirty pieces of silver for each and every working family.

In all likelihood, the voters will take the money but wash their hands of the mob that gave it to them. Labor, slowly but surely, will be crucified on a cross of its own making.

TIME TO PULL THE PLUG (Spectator Easter leader)

Heads bowed in supplication, candles flickering in the gloom, incantations being muttered and faith being reaffirmed in front of a multitude of fellow believers. A mass spiritual occasion, both live and on TV, is always a wondrous sight to behold. And so it was that the extraordinary outpouring of faith last weekend was truly humbling. From the leaning tower of Pisa to the Great Wall of China, via the Holy See of Circular Quay, no corner of the Earth was spared the rituals of devotion as a billion souls partook in switching off their lights for sixty minutes.

Atheists and agnostics, or sceptics as they are now called, often find such overtly spiritual and ritualistic activities quite bewildering. “But what’s the point?” they cry. Yet to the believer, logic and the demand for concrete proof is pointless. The act of supplication is fulfillment enough. The rituals are evidence of belief. And belief is paramount.

As with all religions, the original goal of this church is laudable. To draw attention to the sin of polluting the planet. But when society at large is forced to bear a heavy burden for no perceivable gain, when the economy is being distorted, and when those who dare question the wisdom or effectiveness of the remedies are cast out and vilified as heretics, it is way too late to quibble over the symbolic actions enjoyed by those whose faith is unshakeable.

A mushy, sentimental event with few practical outcomes (other than foisting solar lamps and cookers on people who’d much rather have the carbon-based ones the rest of us enjoy) this latest religion has evolved from it’s original awareness-raising advertising stunt to a bizarre quasi-religious gathering whose main goal – like all such cults – seems primarily to be the perpetuation of itself. It’s time to pull the plug on Earth Hour.

DEATH OF THE DOGSBODY

It was the greatest job of all time. The dogsbody. The job around the office where you had to do all sorts of menial, often humiliating tasks for very little money and working all sorts of horrific hours. Also known as the messenger boy, tea-boy, runner or sometimes even receptionist, these were the jobs of old, that have now largely disappeared, that were the launching pads of many a stellar career.

Their demise came about largely through the internet age, where you no longer have to rely on a physical being to get crucial items from A to B in order to meet your deadline, as well as through higher wage costs, payroll taxes, superannuation and the like. But many a career, mine included, would not have been possible without the mixture of experience, education, work ethic and sheer fun that such jobs provided. From Frank Lowe (founder of multi-national advertising network Lowe and Partners) to top Australian director David Deneen (who created the multi-award winning Filmgraphics company) those individuals who started at the bottom often survived the longest at the top.

For my part, running through the freezing dawn of London’s Soho district with large film cannisters under one hand and still going at 11 at night delivering printers blocks to the hungry machines of Fleet street was my entry into the advertising industry. Paid a pittance, I loved every second of it. It was exhausting, but it was also exhilarating. But above all, it was the hands-on introduction to, and respect for, so many aspects of the business that proved invaluable later on.

“Work experience” is supposedly the modern equivalent. It may just be a Gen Y thing, but time after time I have found those who I have taken on in such a guise have no desire to experience anything arduous whatsoever, particularly work. On top of which, there are so many petty regulations and HR considerations to take into account that the exercise often proves fruitless – on both sides.

“Whatever happens, be there at 6 am on the dot,” I said to one teenage boy, who had professed a great passion for the film industry and a lifelong desire to attend a shoot. “I’ll pick you up. But if you’re not there I won’t wait.”

Had that been the young me, I would have been there, shivering in the cold, from 5.30 onwards. Needless to say, not only did this particular Cremorne -educated kid not show, he didn’t even bother to phone and apologise. “Oh, I slept in,” was the disinterested retort I finally received on inquiring as to his whereabouts.

Somehow, I doubt a successful business of any kind, large or small, will ever bear his name.